Lessons In Love

My husband and I have never really been into celebrating Valentine's Day. It seems kind of silly to have a day to celebrate love. I mean shouldn't we always celebrate love. Then our oldest daughter, Ashley, was born on Valentine's Day so it shifted from a romantic holiday to Ashley's birthday. At the time she was born it seemed so sweet. The pretty little baby girl born on the day of pink hearts, flowers, and love. Two years later when she became autistic, I found it a little ironic that my daughter, who struggles with human relationships, was born on Valentine's Day. Now that she is ten years old, I see how appropriate a birthday it really is for Ashley. Ashley teaches us more about love than anyone I know. She teaches us about true love that lasts. She teaches us about the love that God wants us to have. The love that is talked about in 1 Corinthians 13. Love that is patient, kind, hopeful, and enduring. She teaches us that love is an action not a feeling. We love her daily even when she can't give anything back and even when we don't feel like it because we are too tired and frustrated. She keeps no record of our wrongs. Our family has learned both how to hope and how to endure from Ashley. She teaches us all about unconditional love and what that truly means. We have learned how to love her and each other on the good days and the bad days. I choose to love her when she laughs and hugs me and to love her when she bites herself when she sees me. I see it in the people around us as well. Nothing shows a person's true heart and character better than how they respond to a person who may possibly never be able to give anything in return. Ashley teaches us to be more patient and to love each other more. Through raising Ashley we realize what really is important in life. There are people that look at Ashley and other people like Ashley and think that they are unaware of whether they are loved and how they are treated. But they are aware and more importantly God is aware of how we treat each other, even the least of these. Now I see God gave Ashley the perfect birthday to go with the message she has for us.
Three things will last forever- faith, hope, and love - and the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:13

Wonderful Moments

When my babies were born they seemed so cute and cuddly, but it was hard to really imagine them as real people. People with their own thoughts and opinions completely separate from me. Of course that comes quickly in the toddler years and there are days you really want them to not be "real people", but rather little robots you can control. But what fun would that be! Because along with all the frustrating, embarassing, and crazy moments that come are also the many times that I am truly in awe of the people they are becoming. It seems like the older they get the more often I see those wonderous moments. I think in some ways Josh and Hailey have an advantage. Living with a sister with severe special needs gives them a lot of opportunities to really show that love and compassion. I am always inspired by the absolute devotion they have for Ashley. But what is truly wonderful is they don't expect anything back or any reward for it. Yesterday, I went to the school to pick them all up and I was in Ashley's classroom talking with her teachers. Ashley started heading out to the van and then all of the sudden I see Josh race by the door in pursuit of Ashley. He carefully followed her to the car, picked up her boots that fell off, ran when she ran, helped her with the door, helped her get her stuff in the car, and when he knew she was settled; he went off to play. The only reaon I know is because I watched it all from the window. He never mentioned it until I asked. When Hailey got to the car she buckled Ashley's seatbelt and was asking her if she was okay and if her feet were cold since she walked through snow in socks. It is watching these moments unfold every day that help us through the trials of raising our children. I wonder if that is how God sees us? He could have made us obedient robots instead of giving us free will. Then he wouldn't have to witness the devastation that we do, but he also wouldn't enjoy those wonderful moments when we choose well.

Josh and The Cookies

We just keep having more fun with Josh. This is his night last night as best I can track it. He got up at some point between 1-3 am. Then he searched the kitchen for the cookies we made yesterday. I suspected this could happen since he eats during the night regularly, so I hid them in the oven. He found them and grabbed a handful. He then went to the easy chair with his handful of cookies and immediately fell asleep. While he slept with the cookies, they got crushed all over his body and the chair. Some time around 5:30 am, he decided to get in my bed! So I awoke this morning to a chair, a bed, and a child all covered with cookie and melted chocolate. And best of all he has no memory of any of it. He claims he ate one cookie in the kitchen. So I am left with a lot of cleaning and trying to decide is he lying or was he sleepwalking?? I'm inclined to believe he was sleepwalking because he rarely has any memory of his night activities good or bad and he is not much of a liar. He usually wants to share everything he has done good and bad. I guess we will wait for his confessions tonight when he says his prayers- that is always quite eye opening!