A Parent's Dream - part 2

Yesterday, I discussed the dreams most parents have for their children. I focused my thoughts on some of the things I had hoped would never impact my children’s lives. Today I am thinking about the things I really wanted for my children. The one real dream I had for my children was to have a normal, functional family. I think I defined “normal” and “functional” based on television shows I saw growing up like “The Walton’s”, “Little House on the Prairie”, “The Cosby Show”, etc. Pretty much shows that were centered on a mother, father, and lots of children all living together as a family. I have no memories of living with either my mother or father, much less both together, and I don’t remember living with my sisters either. So this idea of a family unit was very important to me. I got married and a couple years later, we had our oldest daughter Ashley, and then within three years we had three children. We were and are a father, mother, and children all living together as a family. And that is where my dream took a different twist. When Ashley was two we started realizing something was wrong and by the time she was four, we had an autism diagnosis. Then we discovered our son would have his own diagnosis. Wow, that was not in my dream of “normal” and “functional”. It took us a long time to grieve that loss as a family. Today, Ashley is eleven and she has grown and changed so much. It is impossible to predict where she will be years from now. Although in many ways, we have had to let go of the future I wanted for my children. Of course we have moments still today when we intensely feel that loss, but overall we have learned to love the life we have and to enjoy the family we have. Would I call it “normal” and “functional”? Absolutely not. But it is the life we have been given, and I am blessed by this life daily. How I praise the Lord that you are concerned about me again. I know you have always been concerned for me, but you didn’t have the chance to help me. Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. For I can do everything through Christ,[a] who gives me strength. Even so, you have done well to share with me in my present difficulty Philippians 4:10-14

Originally posted April 2011